Like the Detroit Red Wings, we are all winners today. Except for the USMNT.
If you're cool to us, we'll be cool to you. We're cool with TTCS [Tremendous Upside Potential] Jozy will just stay in Spain, thanks (not until July 1)[Soccer by Ives] C. Ronaldo is now ready to move to Spain. Or is he? [Guardian] SGE to Mexico is official. How do you say Dos a Cero in Swedish? [Guardian] Mark Hughes moves to Man City. Now where will Avram! end up? [Guardian] Dear American publishers, we also use copious amounts of cursing in our writing. Can we get a collective book deal? [Kissing Suzy Kolber] (Congrats, Drew)
Spain ought to win the group easily, but every time you make a prediction like that about Spain, they tend to collapse like an overly intricate passing move, so who knows. Originally I would’ve picked Sweden to be the second team to go through, but after thinking about it a bit more I’m not so sure. I think Russia could be a real surprise this time, and I’m not just saying that because they knocked England off in qualifying. And, you know, Greece *are* the defending champions, even if they do play like the Bolton of Europe. Spain and Russia, though, if I had to call it.
GREECE FIFA rank: 8 Odds of winning: 22-1 Coach: Otto Rehhagel How they got here: Finished first in their qualifying group, ahead of Turkey Past record: Beat Portugal to become Euro 2004 champions, but didn’t qualify for the World Cup in 2006 Questions to ask:
Will their obdurate style work for them again this time, or will the other teams have come up with a strategy to break them down?
Can midfielder Giorgios Karagounis and striker Fanis Gekas provide the spark to complement that defensive strength?
How *did* they manage to win in 2004? Really now.
Why to cheer for them: You’ve had one too many shots of ouzo. Opa!
RUSSIA FIFA rank: 25 Odds of winning: 28-1 Coach: Guus Hiddink How they got here: Finished second in their qualifying group, thanks to England’s incompetence Past record: Bottom of their group at Euro 2004; didn’t qualify for the 2006 World Cup Questions to ask:
How much will they miss playmaker Andrei Arshavin, who’s suspended for the first two games thanks to an idiotic yellow card against Andorra?
Will Igor Akinfeev’s quality in goal make up for the fact that the defence in front of him isn’t all that good?
Could the magical Guus Hiddink effect come into play here? First South Korea, then Australia, now Russia…
Why to cheer for them: Out of gratitude for bringing an end to the misbegotten reign of Steve McClaren.
SPAIN FIFA rank: 4 Odds of winning: 5-1 Coach: Luis Aragones How they got here: A few stutters along the way, but ended up top of their qualifying group Past record: A disappointing third in their group at Euro 2004; lost to France in the Round of 16 at the World Cup in 2006 Questions to ask:
With the massive amounts of talent in the team (Fernando Torres, Cesc Fabregas, Sergio Ramos, Xavi, David Villa, Andres Iniesta – really, I could just run through their whole lineup), is this finally the year that they shake off their reputation as the world’s biggest chokers?
How will mad-as-a-hatter Luis Aragones manage to fit all that talent onto the pitch at once? (He’s already made one possibly dubious decision by axing Raul from the squad.)
Will Iker Casillas finally have an aneurysm when faced with a defence even more dodgy than the one in front of him at Real Madrid?
Why to cheer for them: You’re a Liverpool fan who’d like to see your players actually win something this year
SWEDEN FIFA rank: 23 Odds of winning: 33-1 Coach: Lars Lagerback How they got here: Qualified second in their group, behind Spain Past record: Lost in the quarter-finals to Holland at Euro 2004; lost to Germany in the Round of 16 at the 2006 World Cup Questions to ask:
What kind of a boost will they get from the return of veteran Henrik Larsson?
Will Zlatan Ibrahimovic produce the brilliance necessary to drag his team out of their usual so-so performance, or will he be infuriatingly crap as he so often is for Inter?
Will Freddie Ljungberg and Olof Mellberg get into a training-ground fight yet again? And if so, can they sell tickets?
Why to cheer for them: They probably have the best-looking female fans, if you’re into that sort of thing. I’m just saying.
Ah yes, the infamous group of death. Italy and France – the World Cup champions and runners-up, respectively – also met in the qualifying stages, and they’ve been matched up yet again here. Both teams are packed with talent from front to back, and they’ll probably be the ones to get out of the group stage, but you can’t discount the other two teams either. Romania did very well in qualifying, while the Dutch would be one of the favourites in any other group and just happen to be one of the top four seeds, thanks to the vagaries of UEFA coefficients.
FRANCE FIFA rank: 7 Odds of winning: 15-2 Coach: Raymond Domenech How they got here: Finished second in their qualifying group, just edging out Scotland – despite losing to the Scots twice Past record: Lost to Greece in the quarter-finals at Euro 2004; finished second at the 2006 World Cup Questions to ask:
Can they find the right balance between youth and experience? (Karim Benzema vs. Thierry Henry; Patrick Vieira vs. Jeremy Toulalan, etc., etc.)
Will Raymond Domenech regret leaving behind players like David Trezeguet or Philippe Mexes?
Is Franck Ribery really the new Zidane?
Why to cheer for them: You like to pick players based on their astrological signs. (No Scorpios, please!)
ITALY FIFA rank: 3 Odds of winning: 7-1 Coach: Roberto Donadoni How they got here: Struggled initially in qualifying, but ended up topping their group, ahead of France Past record: Finished third in their group at Euro 2004; 2006 World Cup champions Questions to ask:
How much will the loss of captain Fabio Cannavaro hurt them? And isn’t it dangerous to rely on Marco Materazzi to hold your defence together?
What kind of formation will they go with, and will it mean too many square pegs in round holes? (Alex del Piero, I’m looking at you.)
Will they rue bringing nutcase Antonio Cassano when he throws a wobbly in the middle of a game and gets sent off?
Why to cheer for them: Love them or hate them, they do know how to win. Plus, it would piss off the French.
NETHERLANDS FIFA rank: 10 Odds of winning: 12-1 Coach: Marco van Basten How they got here: Qualified easily, but ended up second in their group behind Romania Past record: Lost to Portugal in the semi-finals at Euro 2004, and again in the Round of 16 at the 2006 World Cup Questions to ask:
Can they get through the whole tournament without fighting with each other?
Will the move away from their traditional 4-3-3 to a set-up with two defensive midfielders work? Especially since they have no real defense to speak of?
Why does Ruud van Nistelrooy look so much like a horse? (Van Persie, too, come to think of it.)
Why to cheer for them: Despite supposedly being so good, they’ve never really won anything, so they’re due.
ROMANIA FIFA Rank: 12 Odds of winning: 40-1 Coach: Victor Piturca How they got here: Finished top of their qualifying group Past record: Didn’t qualify for Euro 2004 or the 2006 World Cup – this is their first major tournament since 2000 Questions to ask:
They beat the Netherlands head-to-head in qualifying; can they do it again?
Can former cokehead Adrian Mutu keep up the good form he’s shown with Fiorentina this season?
Really, do they have a hope in hell of getting out of the group?
Why to cheer for them: You’re hoping for someone to play the spoiler and knock one of the so-called big teams out.
SPAIN defeated USA 1-0 in its last warm up friendly before heading to Euro 2008. A game with two halves: a bad first & a better second, as coach Aragones changed the players & positions testing people to find a steady balance.
The first half saw a solid US team plant itself in front of Spain to frustrate their play & cause mistakes. The Spaniards with Silva, Torres, Capdevilla, Alonso… just could´nt connect & gave the team a poor image.
The second half saw changes with Guiza, Navarro, Senna, De La Red …coming in which allowed XAVI to move freely & take control of the game. His passing brought in the flow needed to open up space & give options to CAZORLA (above) & even Ramos from right back. Xavi then continued his magic after hitting the post to score a magnificent ( & Spain´s only goal) in the 79th min. From then on it was all Spain & managed improve their image from the 1ºst 45min & increase confidence.
Great game from the “man” Xavi, along with Cazorla, Senna, De La Red & Ramos…plus Casillas was safe.
Encouraging signs, but Spain will need to improve & find an even balance upfront if they are to be a serious threat at the Euro´s.
According to South Africa’s Football365 website, fans wishing to watch Zimbabwe’s 2010 World Cup/African Cup of Nations qualifier against Namibia on Sunday will have to fork out up to $10 billion for a ticket.
This isn’t a joke. This is ridiculous!
The cheapest ticket is pegged at $1.5 billion!!!
However, those not keen to seat with the povo (a loose term referring to the common people of that country - to use Zimbabwe liberation struggle parlance) will have to pay either $5 billion for a seat in the Upper West stand or $10 billion for the VIP arena.
A full house is expected at the Rufaro stadium as a country ravaged by political turmoil and hyperinflation welcomes the opportunity to escape, albeit temporarily, the hardships of everyday life and finds reprieve in a game of football.
Zimbabwe pulled off one of the surprise results of the opening round of the 2010 qualifiers by holding Guinea to a goalless draw last weekend.
They will be hoping to build on that result by getting the better of early group leaders Namibia, who beat Kenya 2-1 in the opener last Saturday.
The match between the two African rivals, who both go by the same moniker - Zimbabwe simply known as ‘The Warriors’ and Namibia as ‘Brave Warriors’ - is accorded derby status. Bragging rights will also be at stake.
MY POV: Inflation has dragged this country’s dollar way, way down. Having a derelict like Robert Mugabe in power doesn’t help. While I don’t intend to make this a political blog and stoke the flames, I do think he’s an awful politician and a virtual dictator …
Ok, with that out of the way, let’s also say that $10 billion Zimbabwe dollars is worth about $1.69 American dollars …
Still, take a look at this article about the Zimbabwean economy … according to the article, a loaf of bread now costs what 12 new cars did a decade ago.
Inflation rose 1,063,572% in May … ridiculous …
The economic decline has been blamed on the collapse of key agriculture sectors following the violent seizures of farmland from whites. Mugabe claimed the seizures begun in 2002 were to benefit poor blacks, but many of the farms went to his loyalists.
Let’s hope Zimbabwe does better in World Cup qualifiers than they’ve done in politics. The people there deserve that, at least …
This is the picture, striker DAVID VILLA on the floor in pain. He joins Fernando Torres who also received a knock on the ankle & both are in doubt for tonights friendly International against the UNITED STATES.
Not good news at all for SPAIN. Surf in late tonight for the full results of tonights clash with USA.
This is a good one from Scot daily "Scottish Sun" & from local daily "Marca", that Spanish giant REAL MADRID maybe negotiating with Scottish Club HIBERNIAN for its 21 year old forward sensation STEVE FLETCHER.
Sounds like science-fiction but apparently the Scot is a "goal scoring machine" & his price, a "reasonable" 7M€, could be a cool long-term investment. Stay tuned!
Well, our desperate call for tips last month netted is nothing. Apparently, our reader base is smart enough to know that a trip to Vegas is an inherently losing proposition. Good on you all, fellas.
In the end, it seems that we didn't really need anyone to provide us with Rooney drinking pics. All we needed was to read the Daily Mail online. Let's dissect, shall we? So, yeah. Rooney has been spotted in Ibiza taking in a stag night (weekend? week?) with some of his boys. I don't know about any of you marrieds out there, but at my bachelor party, there could not have been a picture taken without two things: alcohol and naked chicks. Rooney's party has the alcohol down, but there is a conspicuous lack of female bodies around. I understand that Rooney is smart enough to know that he will be photographed at every opportunity and must stay away from the ladies, but how about using some of that star wattage to get a little play for your friends? Must the entire night be female free?
Alright, to the pictures.
Whoa, who's the idiot? It's Rooney's brother, of course. Well, if I think about it, maybe the brother is a gemologist just getting off work. Perhaps the family is not so dim after all.
What? Why? It's 2 o'clock in the frickin' morning. Take those fucking sunglasses off your head. And is that a Long Island Ice Tea? I know that's what a real man drinks, an alcohol suicide. Actually, I think it's Cuervo Black and Coke.
This picture's caption should read: "Nope, there's no way that this spotlight is intentionally in me. I sat right under the dome light in the middle of the vehicle by accident. In no way do I want people to see me." but that would be way too long to fit under the picture.
Alright, I have no idea about Ibiza. For all I know it could be a British enclave on a Spanish isle. But come on. You travel to the Mediterranean to drink at a bar owned by Gary Lineker's brother? Isn't there somewhere a bit more authentic you could have gone to? At least put on a sombrero. George Best would.
Finally, a poll. How long will the Rooney-McLoughlin nuptials last? I used to work with a guy that was married for six weeks. Can Rooghlin beat that?
We all know Jose Mourinho from his grumpy, suit-wearing days on the Stamford Bridge sidelines, and now he's found himself a new and more stylish gig traipsing around the edge of the San Siro turf. I fear for him, as his move reminds me very much of the Simpsons episode where Homer, as the Isotopes mascot, gets called up to the big leagues and finds that the masses there simply aren't thrilled by his antics. [Watch out for the click-through in that link, disable those pop-ups!]
In Serie A, after all, everyone gesticulates wildly and causes press hysteria by way of arrogant comments and inflammatory remarks against the referee. In England, he was enough of a novelty to stand out against the pale pastiche of drab, jowly managers from the British Isles, replete with their evasive language and empty platitudes.
Nostalgia aside, he's taken over at Inter Milan, and he's looking to redefine himself as something other than "The Special One", the super-ego that sustained him through three-and-a-bit EPL campaigns.
However, I fail to believe that this new-found humility is really that genuine, so I thought I'd go to the trouble of decoding his words into the language that I know Mourinho still speaks [not English, of course. The clever bastard had to go and learn Italian in a month and greet the media flawlessly in their native tongue].
Join me, won't you?
[Question in Bold, Mourinho's comments in blockquote, my translation in italics]
Mr. Mourinho, you described yourself as 'special' when you became coach of Chelsea in 2004, and they called you 'The Special One'. What do you want to be called now?
This is a very important challenge for me and I have to thank the managers present here, in particular Marco Branca, for choosing me. It will be fun for you too."
Let's face it, I'm still the same as I ever was. This move to Italy doesn't affect that. Special, gifted, genius, call it what you will. And honestly, I will have to be a genius to figure out what to do with a squad whose average age is roughly 32.
Do you think it will be necessary to change many elements of the current Inter squad?
"From what I have read in the press all over the world - not just in Italy and Portugal - it seems as if I have come to coach a team with a squad of 70 players. This isn't good. I want to work in a team of 20-21 players plus the goalkeepers. I think that every player in the world wants to play for Inter, and that every president wants to sell players to Inter.
I like the players in my squad and I don't need to make radical changes. For myself and the management, the team just needs due or three players to improve and be even more competitive. I want the chance to change things a bit because I don't know any coach who has the same ideas as another. But I didn't like what I read about me not liking some of the players in the squad, and that I want to buy all the best players in Europe. This is not true.
I have a clear message that I want to transmit to my players. From now on I want to talk about them as my players. I want to tell all of them that I like the squad and I have faith in them. I have seen a lot of Inter's matches during the season and I appreciated the team's mentality. It's hard for me to wait until mid-July to start."
Before you all start complaining, I will note that I'm bringing in probably 8 players from Chelsea, including that donkey Frank Lampard. Why, I do not know. We Italian teams are shit with the penalty kick. That's the only reason I can think of, but hey, it's enough, right? Eat shit and die, Roman!
Seriously though, I have lots of over-the-hill crap to sell. Roll up, roll up! How much for Hernan Crespo?
Your command of Italian has surprised us. Have you been studying Italian for long?
"I understand your question well. You want to know when Inter contacted me for the first time. I like telling the truth and the truth is that Inter contacted me for the first time the day after the second match against Liverpool, but nothing had been decided then. I hadn't started studying Italian then, only three weeks ago.
It's a neo-Latin language like Spanish and Portuguese, so it was easier. The articles and verb tenses are hard, but the words are similar. It's just a matter of practice and getting used to it, I don't think it will be hard to learn your language.
I have spoken with captain Zanetti on the phone. He has a long experience and he told me that just a few weeks of work are needed to best understand the language of a football team."
Look, you little pen-holding shits, I'm better than you. I learn languages quicker than you learned how to tie your shoes and use proper proofreading marks. In the time it took me to say that, I just learned how to proofread. All learning is easy to me. Swahili, Welsh, the language of the Masai Mara, Jedi, Tagalog... it does not concern me.
I am better than you, and I will always have more money than you. Plus I'm a phenomenal manager. Ancelotti is a useless cunt.
Do you think Italian football is the best in the world at the moment?
"Italian football is the most important and it keeps improving. I always say what I think and I can say that the Serie A isn't currently the best championship in the world. When you hear it said that the strongest teams want to improve, Inter want to improve too, and it is in this way that Serie A will return to the top levels.
This is a further motivation for me and I want to be an extra person because this isn't a job done by one person, but by many. I think this is an ambition and responsibility of everybody, including the press and the whole movement, the referees, the players, the coaches and the managers. I want to make my contribution.
Inter is a team that won the last championship well because it played good football for most of the season, apart from the last two or three months. They always presented themselves as a psychologically strong team and this helped them win the Scudetto."
What do you expect me to say, that it's shit? There's at least three leagues better than this one. I used to work in the best league in the world until I got fired. Now I come to a world of "catenaccio" and flip-flopping. Heck, why do you think we sold Arjen Robben? I was sick of his weak-legged plummeting! And now this place, the land of Gattusos and that cunt Materazzi... shit, he's on my team?
Fuck! Fuck to the highest heavens! We're a league that no-one cares about, and I'm its biggest star!?! Even working under Sven Goran-Eriksson would be a fate kinder than this! Shit fuck shit fuck shit shit shit!
Do you think your squad can win in your first season as coach of Inter?
"I think the results will come because it's the natural consequence of the work done. I always say that my players are the best in the world. I said it when I coached a small club, when I coached Porto, and when I coached Chelsea, and from now on the best players in the world are those of Inter. We can reach positive results by working together. I have won twelve trophies in the last six seasons and I think that I can win something important here too."
Let's be honest. I am talking absolute bullshit. Jose talks down to everyone because no-one can understand him. I coached Porto*, and hopped to Chelsea, taking a lot of players with me, and now I'll do the same here.
I think we can win because this is a terrible, terrible league. Genoa? You mean that place actually exists? Verona? Parma? Livorno? Siena? What kind of horseshit is this? I've never even heard of these teams before. How could I possibly lose?
Portugal is the same way -- you show up, you get good results against Sporting and Benfica, and the rest is shit. Sporting could barely beat Bolton. How much of an idiot do you have to be to fuck that one up? Jose is no idiot.
Inter Milan is the kind of team I dearly love: one that's full of money and established stars that require little tweaking. Sure, I'll steal some players from that dog Abramovich, but this team is ready to shit all over the AS Romas and Catanias of this league. They will bow to me like the deity I am.
If I can't win here, I might as well join the MLS.
* [Funnily enough, Porto just got banned from the Champions League for bribery that occurred during the year that Jose made them the best team around. Oops. We'll be covering this in more detail shortly.]
AC Milan coach Carlo Ancelotti, who has been linked with the vacant Chelsea job, says he wants to remain in charge of the Serie A side.
“I’m staying at AC Milan for sure, and for many seasons to come,” said the 48-year-old Italian in a statement.
“There has been no agreement with Chelsea. They are just rumours, the same ones that come up every year.”
Milan vice-president Adriano Galliani added: “It is out of the question that Carlo Ancelotti goes to Chelsea.”
Chelsea’s search for a successor to Avram Grant goes on, and despite Ancelotti’s insistence that he will not come to Stamford Bridge, sources in Italy suggest the door may not be entirely closed on a possible move to London.
Over the weekend, Galliani said his club had turned down a request from Chelsea to hold talks with their manager of seven years.
Despite his claim, Chelsea issued a statement on Tuesday denying they had asked to speak to Ancelotti.
We’re extremely happy with how our search is progressing
Chelsea statement
“Chelsea has not reached agreement with any individual to become manager,” said the Premier League club. “Nor have we sought permission from any organisation to talk to their manager.”
On Saturday, Galliani had told the Milan website: “(Chelsea) asked for our permission and naturally everything stopped there.
“He (Ancelotti) and another Italian coach were at the top of Chelsea’s list.”
European football writer Gabrielle Marcotti told BBC Radio 5 Live he was not surprised that Ancelotti wants to remain with Milan.
“Ancelotti would be a great manager for Chelsea despite the fact that he doesn’t speak English,” he said. “But every indication I have is that he has no real interest in going abroad.
“He still lives on this farm in central Italy close to where he grew up and he has a long commute even to get to Milan.
“If a guy won’t move from central Italy to Milan I find it unlikely that he would move all the way to London.”
Chelsea’s statement followed reports the club had reached an agreement with Ancelotti’s representatives to succeed Grant.
He was sacked on 24 May, three days after the club’s Champions League final defeat on penalties to Manchester United, but the Blues issued an upbeat update on the search for a new manager.
“We’re extremely happy with how our search is progressing.”
Ancelotti led Milan to the Champions League in 2003 and 2007 and Serie A in 2004 after joining them in 2001 from Juventus.
As a player, he helped the Rossoneri to two Serie A titles and two European Cups, and he is one of five men to have won the Champions League as both a player and a coach.
In 2007, he signed two-year contract extension to keep him at Milan until 2010.
