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Yesterday, it was reported that Cesc Fabregas will miss 4 months with “a knee.” To my mind, Cesc is Arsenal’s first, second and third best player.
Sitting fifth in the table after a disappointing start, will Arsenal finally splash cash on big signings in January? And who stands to benefit from the Gunners’ troubles?
On top of Arsenal’s other struggles, the loss of Fabregas will make the second half of the season that much more difficult. One would expect Arsene Wenger to spend big in the January Transfer window to bring in some experienced depth to protect their VERY lucrative CL spot. However, Wenger’s “Boys Town” strategy defines him. He might well rather finish 5th or 6th his way than claw his way to fourth having brought in grown ups.
Looking at the table, Arsenal are fifth on 31 points. Forget United in fourth; that’s an illusion given their two games in hand. So Villa are three points above the Gunners in true fourth. Below “Boys Town” are Hull, Everton and Fulham. Nothing really scary there, you say? However, consider that Hull grabbed 27 points in their first 18 games. Hull! Who’s to say that an Everton or a Portsmouth can’t make a run? And how many points will Arsenal get in the second half?
Looking further down, it seems that even lowly Tottenham picked the right year to get off to a slow start. Their 19 points after 18 games is pathetic. But that’s only 12 points behind Arsenal and are bound to do much better in the spring. I doubt they’ll catch the Gunners, but that poses the question…
Who is best situated to take advantage of Cesc’s injury on top of Arsenal’s other troubles? Villa is the obvious answer, but who else do you like?
Written by Darkvader on December 23rd, 2008 with no comments.
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The BBC article on England’s training for their upcoming friendly with the Czech Republic is pretty standard stuff. Ashton and Carrick are hurt. Bent and Crouch are off. Ho hum.
But, hello?, what’s this with Jonathan Woodgate?
The 28-year-old defender was excused a session at Arsenal’s London Colney facilities because of his history of fitness problems.
What’s this? He’s excused, not because he’s hurt, but because he gets hurt a lot? What, he gets hurt so easily that he might get a knock in training? Whaaaa?! Couldn’t they at least give him one of those “don’t hit me” red jerseys quarterbacks wear?
Now, certainly, Woodgate has a history of injury problems at Newcastle and Real Madrid. And he has a wide, if perhaps unfair, reputation for being fragile. But he’s avoided those issues for the most part his last two seasons with Middlesbrough and Tottenham. So I guess this caution is for his injury problems from years back?
Why is Jonathan Glassgate even on the squad? If you can’t risk him in training, why risk him in a friendly? Jonathan assures the staff that he will be available against the Czechs. You know, because he’s not actually hurt or anything. Just, um, resting up. Kicking back. Taking it easy. Avoiding any unnecessary risk is all.
Spurs supporters, currently licking their wounds after a comprehensive loss to Middlesbrough to start the season, are counting on a back line anchored by Mr. Glassgate and Ledley King (who has his own, and more recent, history of injury)…
Good luck with that! (Spurs supporters may feel free to have at me for the Carling Cup Final. Johnny certainly wasn’t hurt that day.)
Written by Darkvader on August 18th, 2008 with no comments.
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Harry Redknapp is rightly celebrated in the south of England. After saving Portsmouth from relegation, he put the pieces together for an impressive campaign last year. Top half of the League. A spot in the UEFA Cup. And
an FA Cup that, while perhaps tarnished by a fortunate run of matches (though they did take down United in the quarters), still stands as the first FA Cup won in 13 years by a club other than the Big Four of United, Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool.
‘Arry. The Pompey faithful. Fratton Park . A squad built on steel, muscle, and experience. Playing in a crusty old ground that vibrates every weekend. Managed by a self-promoting but exceedingly personable character who may still be underrated. If there is a side that better personifies the battling nature that should define the middle of the Premiership table, I haven’t found them. Pompey give the Tottenhams’ of the world the shits one would normally get from bad lasagna.
After the jump, I’ll preview YOUR 2009-09 Portsmouth Blue Army…
Harry overpaid for Peter Crouch . 11m pounds. Really? For a guy who couldn’t really get a run at Liverpool and who specializes in terrorizing Macedonia? But the bean pole has underrated ball skills and, after all, just…scores…goals. He returns to Portsmouth to pair Wee Speed Demon Jermaine Defoe in certainly one of the most mouth-watering strike forces in the League. Pompey will score. And we’ll finally see what a full season brings out of Crouch.
David James. It’s almost hard to remember his moniker “Calamity.” Is he the best keeper in the Prem? His gaffes are more rare, and there are few better pure shot-blockers. I’d say fully 17 clubs in the league would take him in a heartbeat.
The Portsmouth back came together impressively last year. Former Hammer and Chelsea bust Glen Johnson has become perhaps England’s best right back. On the left, Herman Hreidarsson…ok, I don’t know a fucking thing about him. But the pairing of Sylvain Distin and slowing-but-proud Sol Campbell are about as stout as any center-half pair this side of United, Chelsea and Liverpool. And ‘Arry brought in Spurs’ reject Younes Kaboul to deputize the back. This is exactly the kind of move that works out for ‘Arry more often than not.
In the middle, former Chelsea and Arsenal man Lassana Diarra proved the big clubs wrong with a special season in a reserved role. And you may have seen Croatian Niko Kranjcar providing service to his mates in the Euro this summer (the link was from an, umm, prior match). The man can play.
In fact, Portsmouth’s one true weakness to this observer is on the wing. ‘Arry lost underrated Sulley Muntari to Mourinho’s Inter (of course, ‘Arry doubled his money on the sale). This will hurt. But where are the wings? You’ve got Peter Crouch’s head up there! Who’s going to ping them off that towering noggin? Width is Portsmouth’s one true question.
My Chelsea get Pompey this weekend. I’m not sweating the match too much, but it will be fun to open the season against this lot. If you’re looking for a club in the Premiership to follow, you could do much worse. Prediction? They’ll be, to my mind, right in the mix for 5th through 7th with Villa and Spurs (I’ve dropped City and Everton from this frame). Villa has to wonder about Gareth Barry’s attitude. Spurs have to knit a whole new squad. Harry is smiling like a Cheshire Cat. Call it 6th.
I’ll leave you with Pompey’s famous song. The Pompey Chimes. Sing it with me to the Westminster Chimes.
Play up Pompey, Pompey play up!
Written by Darkvader on August 15th, 2008 with no comments.
Read more articles on EPL Season Preview and autoglass and portsmouth.
I love the song, OK? Always have. And I have a soft spot in my heart for the entire Hammers thing. The bleak East End economy over the years. The raising of incandescent talent (Frank Lampard, Joe Cole, Rio Ferdinand, Michael Carrick…) for bigger clubs to poach.
The fact is that the Hammers about single-handedly won England their one World Cup (Bobby Moore, Martin Peters and Geoff Hurst… look it up!).
But it’s the song that kills me. “…And like my dreams, they fade and die. Fortune’s always hiding! I’ve looked everywhere! I’m forever blowing bubbles, pretty bubbles in the air!”
Now, sure, if I were a London Chelsea supporter, my soft spot for the Hammers would make little sense. My uncles and dad would have spent their entire life exchanging beatings with Hammers supporters. This is why Bigus mocks me with the sobriquet “Bubbles.”
When I went to the FA Cup Final in Cardiff a couple of years back, I passed on Liverpool luxury box tickets to sit with the Hammer support (this was an easy decision), and I sang their song long and loud at the Millenium Stadium. I drank many pints with Hammer supporters at many pubs. These are the Steelers or Bills fans of the Premiership, except that they drink more heavily, typically have a more checkered past (the discussion over pints surrounded how each bloke had gotten banned from continental stadia), and bleaker prospects.
So, yeah, call me Bubbles. I don’t mind. But it’s a better damned song than even “You’ll Never Walk Alone.” We all have our soft spots for other clubs. Mine is for Hammers.
This season? The buzz is that Alan Curbishley may be the first manager fired in the League. The Hammers have a notoriously short leash with managers. Alan Pardew and, before him, Glenn Roeder were canned early in new seasons after having had success their previous years. Personally, I think that Curbs is example number one of the English Manager job program. English managers always get another chance after mixed results. (see also Glenn Roeder…so maybe the Hammer board is actually smart!)
Last year they finished 10th, putting Spurs fourth in London, and that’s about where I see them this year. Curbs saw injuries to expensive signings Julien Faubert, Craig Bellamy, Keiran Dyer and Scott Parker. This year they are all back, but for how long?.
However, there has been only one big signing this summer: “The Swiss Beckham”, Valon Behrami from Lazio. And they’ve shipped off underwear model Freddy Ljungberg. It appears that the Hammers Icelandic owner wants to wait and see on Curbishley’s success rate. Three successive late season 4-nil thrashings will do that to an owner.
The Hammers have the talent. And Curbishley, all kidding aside, is no slouch. If Dean Ashton and Carlton Cole start scoring and the squad stays healthy? Call it 6th and a spot in Europe. If not? Well, maybe Curbs can move over to the Galaxy….
Written by Darkvader on August 12th, 2008 with no comments.
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Last year, my Blues finished second in three competitions. In the fourth, the FA Cup, they lost to Barnsley. To hear it from the haters, Chelsea choked. You will not be surprised to discover that I view it differently.
Chelsea are nothing if not strong in character and belief. They lost the Champions League on a muffed penalty. They lost the Premiership to a special United season. They lost the Carling to the Spurs because… well someone had to lose a Cup to Spurs at some point. This was not choking. I am a Buffalo Bills fan as well. My friends, I know from choking.
It’s more than just bad luck, though, isn’t it? Look, I think that Avram Grant was a good manager. His accomplishments are impressive. The Dour One took over a dressing room in shock at the sudden, if not surprising, loss of Jose Mourinho and then driving them to the brink of a treble. That’s not easy, and it deserves more respect than it received.
But the fact remains that, tactically, Avram made his share of mistakes. The League was lost on too many late goal concessions to too many Wigans. Grant was categorically out-thought in Moscow by United’s Ferguson. If ever there were a season that showed that last-mile value of a good tactical manager, it was Chelsea’s last campaign.
So, yeah, Big Phil Scolari is exciting. We don’t know how Phil will do in a big league. Phil’s never managed in a big league. Phil has the stones and the passion, as well as the dressing room respect, necessary for success. Tactically? Most agree that Phil’s Brazil and Portugal sides were well managed in big matches. He has to be an improvement over Avram.
The squad?
Peter Cech has been human lately, both last year in Blue and this summer with the Czech Republic. But he’s also still arguably the best keeper in the world. I think that The Cat In The Hat will be fine.
Scolari kept Ricardo Carvalho to partner John Terry at the back. This Chelsea supporter loves JT, but believes that Carvalho is even more valuable. Ashley Cole is now better than he ever was for Arsenal. New signing Jose Bosingwa is exactly what Chelsea have lacked, a threat at right back. Time will tell if he can handle defensive duties.
In the middle of the park, an embarrassment of riches. Frank Lampard was not as incandescent last year, but that only provided space for Michael Ballack to prove his worth. Deeper, Michael Essien is a monster and Jon Obi Mikel still a possible Maka replacement. Add to this the Famous Deco. Few have the little one’s vision and creativity. He’s been fantastic in pre-season play, but I have serious questions as to Deco’s ability to put in the minutes at his age, and the Prem is a hard place for small Southern Europeans.
The other big question is formation. Chelsea have a LOT of talent who are used to playing about every match in the middle of the park. Hmmmm…
Up top, Drogba will be fine. I still don’t see him leaving. If he does leave, we’d better fucking get Robinho. Anelka is not to be counted on. I believe that Malouda will turn good. And Joe Cole is the only Englishman currently playing who can consistently break a defender down off the dribble at speed. Better, Joe was durable last year – posting the most minutes in the squad.
The bench is deep. Cuducini, Bridge, Alex, Belletti, Fucking Sheva, Kalou, Anelka, our tasty 19-year old Argentine starlet Franco di Santo [Ed. Note: a nice video of Spurs conceding goals awaits...] and several others.
Prediction? Chelsea will win the League this year and one more Cup to go with it. And if you are like most of my embittered colleagues here at UF… this will make you insane.
Oh, and Big Phil will make the Big Four Manager mind games fun again!
(I did not mention any further Blue signings. Don’t want to jinx ‘em!)
Written by Darkvader on August 12th, 2008 with no comments.
Read more articles on Chelsea FC and EPL Season Preview and autoglass.
This pictorial evidence of the bad blood within the Texas classico comes after our earlier post regarding Will Farrell’s discerning taste in apparel.
The fact is that the very sight of certain shirts can elicit a surprisingly strong and reflexive reaction within many of us. Who amongst us has not had their heart drop upon walking into a barbeque and discovering a good friend’s son decked out in some Arsenal rag?
Who hasn’t struck up a conversation with an airport passerby sporting the yellow of Norwich or some other rarely seen specimen? Who doesn’t judge the wearer on the flimsy basis of their choice of Bandwagon Red, whether it be of the Manchester or Merseyside variety?
After the jump, a tour of this Blue’s visceral reactions…
Of course, I’m going to start with the Gunners. I just joined the stable of a Blog that should arguably be renamed Unprofessional Arse. I can guarantee that this post will be tagged with “Douchebags in Chelsea Shirts.” [Ed. Note: hey, I'm here to fulfill that guarantee!]
I understand the Haters.
In short, I have a number of good friends who support the Arse. Hirshey is kind enough to never wear Gunner colors, but many of them can’t resist outfitting themselves in a shirt fully 5x too large to be worn by an actual Arsenal player. I see the shirt, and bile rises within me. No matter if they’ve helped me move or bought me pints when I’m short… I hate them then. I’ve gotten in arguments with 8-year-old boys wearing the damned things. You just have to walk up them and make a snide-ass comment, doncha? Yo! Put down the Montrachet, ya prancing ponce! This dude has put down his burgundy and is rockin’ OUT!
The Red of United or Liverpool doesn’t get as much of a rise out of me. I mean, it’s not likely that Floyd Mayweather here, or the dog, or your typical United or Liverpool wearer, really has invested much in the game. They got the shirt because of the history, because United and Liverpool are the Yankees and Cowboys of English football. I would venture to say that, globally, United shirt-wearers watch fewer minutes of actual football than the wearers of any other shirt. Most American Liverpool supporters actually think the Reds could win the Prem some day. How much football could they possibly be watching? So you think, “sigh, well, the shallow fans come with the growth of the game in the States, don’t they? I suppose that’s good.”
I came VERY close to putting up a picture of my seven-year old in his Chelsea shirt. I thought better of that. But this is someone’s son. Sure, you say, Chelsea is the new bandwagon. But while wearing Chelsea isn’t quite as controversial as wearing Lazio, it’s hardly an easy choice to wear the shirt of a side that about everyone hates for xenophobic, anti-semitic, or plain spiteful, jealous reasons, is it? Anyhoo, I see a young lad in Blue and it makes me smile. Then I ask him who his favorite player is. (my son’s is Joe Cole).
QPR shirts in Chicago! I love seeing folks in QPR, or Wolves, or Ipswich, or Nottingham Forest shirts. I have a good friend who wears West Brom. Instant conversation! Always something to discuss. And they’ll likely know the game. And their happy you asked after their shirt since they can go days without anyone recognizing it. Makes you want to sing Small World, eh?
These guys? Run. Just run. Why? I can think of five good reasons right off the top of my head. Anyway, don’t make eye contact. Just move along and go home and hug your wife.
What about you? What are your Rorschach Shirts? What sends you into a spittle-spraying rage? What makes you immediately buy the wearer a pint?
Let us know in the comments.
Written by Darkvader on July 28th, 2008 with no comments.
Read more articles on Arsenal and Douchebags in Chelsea Shirts and Leeds United and Liverpool FC and Norwich City and Photo Essay and autoglass and fandom and manchester united and moments in rivalry.
[Ed. Note: we'd like to formally welcome Autoglass, the trouble-causing Chelsea fan, to the UF blogging ranks. You might remember him from this splash of glorious prose detailing what Arsenal means to him, and you can welcome him properly in the comments. If Chelsea spend big money, we can all expect him to gloat about it. Take it away, Blue!]
Ingerland, Ingerland, Ingerland!
It’s one of the better chants in International football, to my ear. Simple, but sung with urgency that wills the best of English youth on to success in “their” game. If you spend a lot of time with an Englishman, you can almost smell the desperate passion for their national team.
The closest we’ve come is the 1980 Olympic Hockey team (USA! USA! USA!). That team had NO expectations thrust upon it beforehand, so the passion was limited to the tournament itself and, of course, proved to be rewarded with gold.
While it’s been 42 years since England have won anything, I reckon that an English victory in the World Cup or Euros would about cause many of my closest friends’ heads to explode with joy.
… or maybe their sons’ heads to explode, ‘cuz it may be a while.
Sir Trevor Brooking, head of the English Football Association, recently engaged in some tactical expectations-lowering when discussing the National side…
“I thought there was a lot of quality football in Euro 2008 and the fact we didn’t qualify was almost a reality check,” Brooking told Sky Sports News. “We don’t want to go from that (not qualifying) to saying we need to be in the last four of the World Cup.”
Put that in context. Imagine Mike Krzyzewski coming out ahead of the Olympics and saying that US expectations should be about making the medal round rather than winning the whole thing. Patience, Mike counsels!
“What!? We invented the goddamn game! You’re going to cede excellence to buncha Brazilians and Croats!!!”
It’s been said before, and by better thinkers than me: England have some serious issues with their national team development. They’re a side so balled-up with the nauseating fear of failure that they sometimes seem more concerned with keeping their butts clenched tight than with constructing an actual attack.
They possess talent that, for all the money and hype in the world’s richest league, is remarkably lacking in the ball skill necessary to break anyone down at the highest levels. I mean, you’ve got Joe Cole, Theo Walcott and… who else, exactly? Gerrard and Lampard and Rooney ain’t dribbling past anyone. Too often they are left with their admirable grit and steel, and unimaginative long balls hoofed up to the head of Peter Crouch.
England just failed to make the final 14 of the Euros (given the last two spots to Austria and Switzerland), and it’s worth noting that Europe has 13 spots for the World Cup. The English consider one of those spots their birthright on the way to, as Brooking points out, an expected spot in the Semis.
While unlikely, it’s still quite possible that things could get worse for the Three Lions before it gets better.
Written by Darkvader on July 22nd, 2008 with no comments.
Read more articles on Lowered expectations and Making fun of England and The FA and autoglass and playing the media game.
Yesterday, it was reported that Cesc Fabregas will miss 4 months with “a knee.” To my mind, Cesc is Arsenal’s first, second and third best player. 
